Monday, January 7, 2013

Episode 72: The Shaming of Count Fundus

There are times when one's course of action runs like a clear line of dogsled tracks through the unbroken snow, and by starting at the logical point of origin and following the brave, blazoned trail one reaches the final conclusion with an air of inevitability, bounding across the finish line to the cheers and accolades of one and all.

And sometimes your dogs pull you off of a glacier and down, down, down to an icy death.

Plank Town on fire...
Thus it is when DCM, a newly enfortressed town at their disposal, one infernally imbued with the chaotic essenses of the Abyss, decides to play 'interior designer' with barrels of smoke powder, a five-headed dragon and moat filled with beer.

Whether the motivation was demonic paranoia fueled by alcohol and megalomania or just the result of extended gaming outside the Pit of Despair, the attendant members of DCM decided that the best way to drown out the sounds of Tiamat's cries was to blow a hole in Plank Town's walls and drain the beer moat into the cellars.

And, in true DCM fashion, it kinda worked.

So much so that the draconic screams were reduced to liquid mumbles and everyone was able to sleep. But in the morning, not only was everyone surprised to find that Plank Town was back to normal again, (read: merely uninhabited by Fundus and his menchildren) but a pageboy by the name of Douchecoosh had turned up at the gates, summoning DCM to Prince Englebert's for the public shaming of Count Fundus.

A familiar statue...
But when the shaming ceremony turned out to be a little too tame for Xeno and Xoe's liking, shit got real. Xeno charged off after Fundus, years of the distilled sap of vengeance boiled down to a hot syrup of hatred.
Xoe, Takemiya and Ragnar headed into the Prince's mansion, only to make a dark and chilling discovery...

Also, I've quite forgotten what 'Billy and the beer nuts' refers to, but I have a good idea...

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