Episode 47: Horror Vacui

From the desk of Ingnatious Prim, Esq.

Senior Reprobate, First Class

The Naugahyde Cotillion

To the emmissaries of the following dieties:

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____ ______________ (Long May His Beard Reign)

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_ __ ___ The Ever Mightie

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Report 2, Code 1-1 A.

The God Squad (formerly Der Chelonian Mobile Enterprises ) have, as I'm sure Your Eminences have heard/forseen, obliterated Arijani, High Lord of Sri Raji. Not only have they managed to slay an Abyssal Lord outright, in his own plane, (and in his bathrobe, for that matter) but they have also achieved a number of outstanding/improbable/worrying (circle one) outcomes on the Higher Path.

To whit:

A) Koresh, having personally slain Arijani, has been installed as the 665th Lord of Sri Raji. While this may not be exactly what Your Eminences had in Mind(S), one has to credit Koresh for a certain impeccability of style - especially considering the ancient and eldritch prophecies regarding the permanent powers and immortality to be bestowed upon the The One to be crowned as the realm's 666th Lord. Koresh will need an extreme run of luck to survive more than a few hours once word of Arijani's demise gets out.

B) Having instantaneously received news of Arijani's demise, the neighboring Abyssal Princes and Lords immediately set out to fill the ensuing power vacuum. Fortunately for the Squad, The Enigma finally tapped into the Innerconnected Consciousness of Pure Crystal Mind and produced a number of Doves of Radiance, using them to great effect vanquishing a number of invading Outer Demons (and quelling more than a few inner ones as well.) The Enigma may be a key figure in the (probably short) future of New South Waco (tentative realm title) as his powers seem to be attuned to negating the local forces of both Chaos and Evil.

C) More worryingly, however, is the Power Surge unleashed by Ms. Haze. With Koresh swallowed (by his own ineptitude?) by a portal to an unknown layer of the Abyss, and with Stonehenge beset by a triad of demons, Ms. Haze attempted to disrupt matters by using a powerfully magical pick to break open the temple floor. Instead she managed to open a rift straight through innumerable layers of the Abyss, and in the process swallowed the triad of demons whilst rescuing Koresh from his demonic hiatus, but not before conferring him the power of demonic flight.

So all in all, just another day at the office for The God Squad.

Please let me know if and when I should intervene, either on Your Esteemed Behalves or for the good of the multiverse in general.

Yours,

I. Prim